The Eldar Conspiracy

by Dariyel Zilthass

Weak-minded humans!

Your limited intellect cannot grasp that the true force behind the increasing tension amongst the Imperial factions.  Such discord can only be generated by the seeds of discontent sown by the powerful Eldar mind.

It was the Eldar that whispered in Leman's ear, informing him of the "poor house training and rubbing against one's leg" remarks uttered by Lion 'El Jonson.  The ensuing enimity between the Space Wolves and Dark Angels is one of our greatest accomplishments.

It was the Eldar, cleverly disguised in outdated power armor and monk's robes, that made random appearances before Dark Angels throughout the galaxy.  Thus, Operation: Wild Goose Chase succeeded in distracting the most somber of Adeptus Astartes.

It was the Eldar that distributed multiple copies of the Codex Astartes (via the great Craftworld Kinko), thereby elevating the ravings of an anal-retentive pen-pusher into the sacred bible of Marine Chapter creation.

It was the Eldar, in an attempt to rid themselves of their vast supply of obsolete lasguns, that armed the multitude of the Imperial Guard with inferior weapons.  In doing so, we have created "bolter envy" and an inferiority complex amongst a numerically superior foe.

And while we wish we can take credit for the problems suffered by the Blood Angels, alas, their congenital defects are a direct result of their inability to refrain from inbreeding.

Dariyel Zilthass
Farseer of the Shadowhost of Ulthwe

P.S.  For those of you who listen to your Sigs, that's the Eldar, whispering to you through the Infinity Circuit.